"You know, for someone who doesn't eat, you cook pretty good." Xander was happily sitting up in bed, eating off of the tray of food Angel had brought in for him.
"ThanksI think. Is there anything else you want?"
"Ooo- some barbecue sauce would be good on this chicken."
"I thought your stomach hurt?"
"It does" he answers, rubbing his ailing tummy appreciatively.
"Don't you think you shouldn't have anything too spicy then?"
"No way! I've got a cast-iron stomach. Besides, that's just one of those old superstitions. An old wide tale or whatever you call it"
"An old wive's ta- never mind" Angel sighs, headed into the kitchen for what he estimated to be the hundreth and third time. "Here" he hands him a bottle once he returns. "But don't blame me when you get sicker."
"Never gonna happen my man. In the past eighteen years I've never gotten sick from food"
An hour later
"This is the worst I've gotten sick from food in eighteen years" Xander mumbles, emptying his stomach once again in the bathroom as Angel looked on, letting out a sigh that was halfway between a laugh and a desperate cry.
"I'm really beginning to hate vacations"
*Ding ding ding*
"Wellat least I managed to finish a whole chapter this time," Angel sighs to himself, setting his book aside as he gets up to answer Xander's latest call. "You rang?"
"There's nothing on tv," he whines in between coughs.
"Why don't you read something?" Angel suggests, anxious to return to his own book.
"Who do I look likeyou? Newsflash Angel- books and vacation do not mix."
<Vacation? *This* is a vacation?> "Okaywhy don't you play cards with yourself or something? Maybe draw, orplay with the fish," he smiles, eyeing the tank resting on Cordy's bureau.
"And exactly how do *you* play with fish Angel, cause to us normal folk, fish aren't exactly the play kind of pets."
"I don't know Xander! Justfind something else to do besides annoy me, okay?"
"I wanna watch a video!" Angel looked around Cordelia's room, noticing that a vcr was nowhere in sight.
"The only vcr is in the living room. If you want to watch a tape, come lay out on the couch and I'll put one on for you."
"I don't wanna move! I'm nice and comfy right here."
"Well Xander, it's either that or me bringing the thing in hereoh no. Xander come on! I don't know the first thing about setting these things up, and Cordelia would have a fit if I ruined anything of her's."
"Owww!" Xander let out a sharp moan in response. "My pancreasmy gallbladdermy lower thorax!!"
"You don't have a lower thorax Xander! That's only in insects!"
"Well I told you I was really sick! I'm so sick I'm starting to sprout bug parts! Owww"
"Okay, okay! I'll bring it in here"
To Angel's, as well as Xander's amazement, setting up the vcr wasn't as hard as he'd anticipated. Within a few minutes, everything was all hooked up. "Okaywhat tape do you want to watch?"
"How the Grinch Stole Christmas!"
"It's the middle of June and you want to watch something having to do with Christmas?"
"Hey- it's an all-time classic movie!" Angel goes back into the living room where Cordy's tapes were collected and grabbed it from the shelf, reading the back of the box as he headed back into the room. "This isn't even a movie, Xanderit's a thirty minute cartoon."
"Who cares? It's awesome! You should stay and watch it with-"
"Oh no. I'm goodthanks anyway. Justbe quiet and watch your cartoon, okay?" Xander joyfully scoots near the end of the bed, drink in hand, to get an upclose view of his cartoon.
After about an hour, Angel figured that Xander had fallen asleep after the tape and began to thank god for small miracles. For the entire afternoon, he hadn't been off of his feet for more than twenty minutes and was practically clawing at the door, waiting for the others to come home.
Upon hearing the noises and Xander's accompanying 'oops', Angel knew he'd spoken too soon. Hopping up from his seat, he raced into the bedroom only to find Xander's now-empty glass laying beside the fruit punch covered vcr.
"Xanderplease tell me you didn't"
"It slippednext thing you knowpoof! I think it's broke"
"Cordeliais goingto skitz!!"
"Hey- you've been practicing since last time! Good use of the word, Angel. And here I thought you'd forgotten my little lesson in modern language!" Angel's angry eyes shifted slightly up to meet Xander's, wondering just how one person could be so annoying and clumsy all in one. "Oh wellno use crying over spilled fruit punch, which, by the way, I need another glass of," he asks, shaking his glass in front of him as a not-so-subtle hint. "Only, can you make it lemonade this time?"
Having no other clue as to how to react, Angel wordlessly grabbed the glass, marched into the kitchen and poured him a glass, making sure to put in the straw that Xander had consistently reminded him to include with his drinks whenever he wanted lemonade. "Here" he wimpers, handing him the glass as he passes a look to the broken vcr.
"Thanks- hey, wait a minute! Angel, what did I tell you before? The straw is facing the wrong way"
"Ohhere, let me get that," Angel smiles, taking the glass out of Xander's hand and turning it upside down over his head, spilling the drink and ice all over him.
"What the hell- are you crazy!!"
"I think I'm pretty close to it after taking care of you all day!" He slammed the glass onto the bureau, finally having had enough of Xander's lunacy.
"Well this is just great!! Now I'm all wet, and I'm probably gonna go into a relapse thanks to you!!"
"Oh give me a break! You're probably not even sick!" Xander's eyes widened as he pulled himself off the bed, slowly pacing towards Angel.
"Are you calling me a liar?"
"Noliar is too good. You're a deceitful charlatan!"
"Hey- if you're gonna insult me, you'd better do it in english!" Angel could only roll his eyes as he left the room, willing to just drop the subject and return to his book. Xander on the other hand wasn't willing to let things go that easily.
"Don't you walk away from me!" he shouts, running after him. "I haven't thought of a good comeback yet!"
"Xander- let's just drop it, okay?"
"No! Apologize for dumping that lemonade on me!" Angel was willing to drop the matter, not apologize for it.
"After the way you've treated me?! And especially now that you've ruined Cordelia's vcr?!"
"There seem to be a lot of those whenever you're around!"
"Oh that's it! That is it!! This sick man's taken just about all he's gonna take from you, you bigyou bigvampire!!"
"You're losing your touch, Xander. Now I know why you lost class clown!" Angel turns his back on him, hoping the two of them would be able to calm down without saying anything they'd regret. "Look" he takes a deep sigh, rubbing a hand across his forehead before continuing. "Maybe I shouldn't have dumped that- umph!!"
Angel was completely thrown off balance as Xander jumped him from behind, wrapping his arms around his neck, trying to choke him down to the ground as he wraps his legs around his waist.
"Xander!! Aggh! What are you doing?!"
"Trying to choke you! Now hold still, will ya?!" Angel was finding it difficult to maintain his footing as Xander started punching him on the top of his head. Suddenly, tripping over the rug that laid in the living room, both men are sent spiraling to the ground, continuing their impromptu wrestling match.
"Get off of me!" Angel shouts, grabbing him by the leg.
"Apologize first you gargoyle!!"
"Do you really want to resort to childish name-calling?"
"Good- so do I, you simpering twit!!"
"Lousy excuse for a corpse!!"
"Ummmexcuse me?" The two managed to disentangle themselves long enough to look up at the front door, nervously grinning as Buffy, Cordelia, Willow, and Oz all stood, mouths dropped wide open at the sight before them. "Is this like quality time?" Oz spoke again. "Do you want us to go?" Both Angel and Xander were dumbfounded, though Xander still managed to keep his arms firmly gripped around Angel's neck.
"Angel, what's going on?" Buffy demanded, giving the both of them an angry stare as she tries to hide her amusement at the situation. "What the hell did Xander do to you?!"
"Me!" Xander finally released his grip from Angel, pulling himself to his feet. "He started it!"
"Maybe it's just me" Willow shyly speaks up, "but I find that really hard to believe."
"Sure- take his side! Don't worry about the fact that your *sick* friend has been harrassed!"
"Funny" Oz steps towards Xander, giving him a quick once over. "You don't look so sick to me."
"Well who can afford to be sick when they've got the Dark Angel of Death to deal with!" As Angel gets up himself, Xander begins walking towards Cordelia's bedroom. "I'm going back to bed to get as much rest as I can, cause I'll be damned if I'm gonna stay sick and be stuck in this house with him again tomorrow!"
"Unbelievable!" Cordelia tosses her bag onto the couch, throwing her hands up in the air. "We leave for a few hours and return to 'When Wild Idiots Attack' !"
Xander sneezed loudly as he reached the bedroom, causing the others to stare down at him. It was Cordelia's sudden sneeze that finally drew their attentions away from Xander.
"This doesn't bode well" Oz surmises, watching as the brunette lets out another sneeze.
An hour later and Cordelia still couldn't believe it. She was a head cheerleader, one of the most powerful girls in school. Queen C did not get sick.
A wicked bout of coughing was proving its point to the contrary. Xander looked at her sympathetically as they were cuddled together in her bed. Somehow, he had a feeling that this was his fault. He reached over and handed his girlfriend the Sudafed. Cordelia stared at it for a moment as though not comprehending what it was. Reluctantly, she swallowed two tablets. "This sucks"
Welcome to my world, Xander muttered drowsily.
"Okay guysthere's some soup on the stove and a bunch of orange juice in the fridge, so you two should be okay for the night."
"You're leaving the both of us!" Cordy hacks out, reaching for another tissue.
"You can take care of each other. Xand's getting better so this will be *his* turn to start waiting on someone hand and foot."
"Wait a minute-" Xander sits up in bed at her last remark. "I didn't go and open my big mouth like Deadboy did and volunteer to play nurse for *her*!" he shoots a pointed stare over at his girlfriend.
"And just what is that supposed to mean?" Cordelia pouts.
"You wouldn't even stay here with me when I was sick! Why should I have to take care of you now that you're sick?!"
"Because you're the one who got me sick in the first place! Now shut up and get me some more orange juice."
Leaving the lovebirds to sort out their caretaking arrangements for the evening, Buffy turns into her own room, passing by Angel to change into her bathing suit. "Xander and Cordelia both getting sick...I never expected that. But then again, I never expected that they'd ever wind up dating either."
"Neither did I," Angel answers, tossing on a white t-shirt over his black shorts. "I don't think much of their taste in people, but at least they have each other...no matter how twisted, cheap, arrogant, and annoying they may be." Buffy reemerges from their bedroom in her bathing suit, laughing at his remarks.
"Plus, they're out of our hair for the night, so that's a huge note on the positive side," she beams. "Whatever makes them happy, I guess. Ready?"
"Yeahlet's go." He grabs her hand, preparing to head out the door with Oz and Willow when he suddenly remembers something. "Give me one minute." He races into the kitchen to grab a glass, filling it with lemonade and a straw.
"Here you go, Xander" he smiles, handing him the drink as he enters Cordelia's bedroom. "Thought you'd like some lemonade. And I've even got the straw facing the right way so you won't *spill* it all over yourself like the last time" Without giving him a chance to respond, Angel happily strolls down the hall to meet up with the others, already outside on the porch.
"All set?" Oz asks him.
"Yeahjust wanted to get Xander a drink, that's all."
"What was that for?" Buffy tried to sound angry as she yelled at Angel for dunking her under the wave, but her smile gave her away. Before Angel had the chance to answer, she splashes him directly in the face. Angel rubs his face with his hands, then submerges them into the water, pushing them forward and upward, sending another stream of water in Buffy's direction.
For a good hour, the two couples act like children, splashing about in the ocean, and dunking each other under the water, trying to make the most of Angel's first visit to the beach in years.
As a final splash, Buffy musters up all her strength, and spins around in a circle, creating a mini tidal wave just big enough to drench Angel. When she stops spinning, she notices Angel was underwater. As she looks around herself to see just where he is, Angel comes up from the water directly underneath of her, and Buffy now found herself helpless atop his broad shoulders as he stood up completely in the water.
"Don't you think you've gotten into enough fights today?" she squeals out, never knowing her creature of the night boyfriend could be as playful as a bunch of teens.
"That was not my fault," he insists. "Xander literally jumped me from behind. He said he was trying to choke me," he laughs, running a wet hand over Buffy's thigh eliciting a giggle from her as well.
"That would've taken a pretty long timehis fever must've made him delusional," Willow jokes, splashing Oz in the face again. "Poor Cordelia though. Now she's stuck sick too. But who knowsmaybe this will teach the two of them to appreciate one another. You know sometimes I think those two are really good for each other-"
"More like *deserve* each other," Oz reminds her.
"Yeah," Buffy agrees. "That relationship is like the blind leading the blindor the dumb leading the dumber- take your pick." As she feels Angel start to shake her from her position atop his shoulders, she lightly smacks him on the head. "Alright, alright, you win. Come on, let's head back to the house. We can check up on Twedledee and Tweedledum, then relax in the pool."
Buffy slides herself down from Angel's shoulders and onto his back, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, as Angel picks up their stuff and makes his way back to the house carrying her piggyback around his back as Oz and Willow followed alongside them.
Once they arrived back at the house, Willow and Oz decided to call it a night, volunteering to check on the beachhouse's sick ward before turning in. Meanwhile, Angel, with Buffy still wrapped around him, makes his way out onto the back deck to relax in the pool.
"Don't think that I'm complaining or anything, but it's going to be a little rough settling down in the pool if you're around my back," Angel says with a laugh.
"OhhhI see what ya mean. No problem," she says, and she proceeds to climb down off of Angel's back, only to jump ontop of
him, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, holding on for dear life as Angel falls backwards into the pool.
"See..." says Buffy, trying to keep a straight face, "problem solved. We settled into the pool just fine." She runs a hand through Angel's drenched hair and pulls him in for a kiss.
The couple spends the lazy evening just holding each other, talking about anything, from the gorgeous scenery to some new ideas for slaying.
Buffy's lips soon make their way to Angel's chin as she begins to deeply kiss his soft spot along the underside of his jaw. "You know," says Angel, thoroughly enjoying Buffy's toying with him, "two can play at this game." He tilts Buffy's chin up as he relinquishes an arsenal of kisses to her neck, stopping only at her own soft spot at the nape of her neck to dish at the same kind of
loving torture to Buffy.
"Mmmm...ok...uuh...you win, you win." Angel pulls his head up to face her after she surrenders.
"I always do," he says, giving her a quick kiss.
"Yeah...well we'll see about that tonight," she says with a seductive smile.
The two sat in peaceful silence as they watched the overlook of the quiet ocean, the graceful moonbeams glimmering as they hit the ocean's horizon, disappearing into shattered fragments of white and crystal blue.
By early the next morning, Xander was feeling almost one hundred percent better. Cordelia on the other hand was an absolute mess. Youre just going to rest today, he informs his girlfriend, leaning over in bed to brush his hand across her forehead as she sneezed. How do you feel?
Ugh, was Cordys weak reply. Like an ogres tap dancing on my head. Xander couldnt help but smile at her typical dramatic reply. As much as he really did love Cordelia, the two often spent most of their time arguing and this was probably the longest they had ever gone without fighting.
Cordy sneezes loudly, groaning and resting her head against the pillows to gaze at the ceiling. "Why do these kind of things always happen to me? What did I ever do to anyone?"
"You starting to feel like that too?" Xander chuckles. "You'll be fine by this afternoonmaybe we'll even get a chance to go on the beach together this weekend after all. I was starting to think I would've been better off just staying-"
"Xander, do you mind? We're talking about *me* here, remember? The really sick one?"
"Oh- like I'm the picture of health?! I'm still sick ya know!"
"Not sick enough to stay in bed with me all day, and I know that's what you're planning on doing! I barely got any sleep last night because of all your tossing and turning. I mean, it's bad enough I had those two wild bunnies' moaning to deal with. So just shut up and get me some breakfast would ya?"
"If it'll shut you up" he mumbles, getting out of bed to head for the kitchen, cringing as he heard the sudden ringing coming from her bedroom. <I knew I should've hidden that bell in a better place>
Smiling to himself as he heard the familiar sound, Angel runs his fingers through his lover's hair, sighing down at her sleeping form as he wraps his arm around her, snuggling back down into the covers with her. With his lips pressed against her back he smiles as he feels the vibrations of the soft sigh escaping her lips. "HmmmI hear bells" she tiredly announces, rolling over to face him.
"I think Xander's finally getting a taste of his own medicine," he laughs, lightly brushing lips with the beauty he held firmly in his arms.
"It would serve him right," Buffy giggles, nuzzling against Angel's neck. "But I still feel kinda bad for him. I mean, when it comes right down to it, Xander's really a great friend and he's really gotten the full shaft job this week." Hearing his moan of agreement, Buffy's eyes dart up with an idea. "You know what would be really great? What if tonight before we leave" After hearing her plans to surprise Xander, Angel had to admit he thought the young man deserved some sort of compensation for everything that had happened to him.
"Hey Angel!" Xander's steady pounding at their door wasn't helping the couple capture a few more peaceful moments of sleep. "Do you know how to make french toast?"
"You were saying" Angel sighs, sharing an amused look with his beloved.
"I said he was a great friendI didn't say he wasn't annoying as hell!"
Receiving no answer, Xander was still apprehensive about just barging into their bedroom, knowing full well just how he was likely to find the over-affectionate couple. "Angel?? Come onCordy will be bitching all day if I don't make her her damn breakfast. Do I have to beg?" Reluctantly pulling himself away from Buffy, Angel pulls on his shorts, headed for the door. "Now that is something I'd like to see."
"Ha! I just wanted you to open the door!" Xander blurts out, grabbing him by the arm and attempting to pull him along into the kitchen.
"Xander" Angel stares at the poor boy, tugging helplessly at his arm and soon realizing the vampire wasn't budging.
"You don't seriously want me to beg" he turns around, somewhat exhausted from his efforts to move him. "Do you?"
"NoI suppose not."
"But I do!" Buffy excitedly cheers, emerging in the doorway behind Angel, a wide grin plastered across her face. "Socome on, Xand." With the surprise she was planning for him later that evening, she just had to get out this last form of humiliation. Seeing him not making any effort to utter the words to Angel, she brushed past her boyfriend, approaching Xander to lean on his shoulder. "I'm sure by now Cordelia has taught you to beg," she giggles, finally getting to him.
"You two are gonna pay for this" he mutters, rolling his eyes as the words finally escape his lips. "I'm begging you to help me, Angel"
"Now was that so hard?" Buffy pats him on the head affectionately, strolling into the kitchen to sit down at the table alongside Willow and Oz. "Ohand while you're at it, you can make the rest of us breakfast too!"
"OoooI want pancakes!" Willow shouts.
"I'm an omlette man myself," Oz smiles.
*Ding ding ding*
"Xander!!! Where's my breakfast!" Cordy's scratchy voice calls out from her room. "What did you do- go to France to get the damn toast?! I'm starving!"
"What would it take for you to go in there and snatch that bell from her?" Xander whispers to Angel as they walk down the hall into the kitchen. "Cause I would definitely beg you to do that."
"And deny you the fun of waiting on an ungrateful whiner, hand and foot, answering to every single ringing of a bell?" Angel places a hand across his chest in mock sincerity. "Xander- I like you way too much to deny you that privelage." He hands him some bread, pointing him towards the stove as he sits down beside Buffy, ready to instruct Xander's cooking lesson.
"Hey Xand," Buffy grins, taking full advantage of the situation, "I think I want some chocolate chip pancakes instead of french toast."
"Oh, and how about some bacon with my omlette," Oz suggests, following Buffy's lead.
"Muffins are always good with pancakes," Willow chimes in.
"What's this look like to you guys- a buffet?" Xander slams down a few more pans onto the stove in frustration. "You'll eat whatever I make you!"